Moving abroad as a couple: the advantages and disadvantages

In this case, is it better to go alone or with someone else? In reality, it all depends on the nature of your move and your long-term goals. In order to help you weigh the pros and cons, Multitra, the international moving company, is presenting the advantages and disadvantages of moving abroad as a couple.

You can prepare together

If you have chosen to move abroad as a couple, there is a good chance that you will be better prepared for your move than if you were alone. All you have to do is clearly define your move and each person’s role, both in terms of organising your departure and what to do once you arrive. If you have landed a new job abroad or been accepted into a foreign university and have to move, you need to establish an action plan. Will your partner be happy to be the follower, or is it better for them to make their own choices for the future, such as finding their own job or continuing their studies? In any case, if you hope to be successful, you will have to stick together and support each other. While you take care of the formalities, such as obtaining a visa or the appropriate permits, your partner could identify their preferred city or neighbourhood and start looking for accommodation. Moreover, consider setting a budget and creating an emergency plan in case things do not work out in the way that you had hoped. Once again, make decisions together after careful consideration.

You won’t feel alone

If you move as a couple, it will probably be easier to overcome the difficulties associated with moving abroad than it would be if you were alone. Although you may feel homesick when you are far away from your family and friends, and removed from your favourite places and old habits, having your partner there will reassure and comfort you. For example, after a long day of work, you always know who to turn to for a chat or to discuss how you are feeling. And if you do not know anyone yet, no reason to worry! You can go out for dinner or a drink together, spend your weekends shopping or explore your new home together. If you’re shy, you can always count on your partner to order your meal in a restaurant or ask locals for information if you need to.

Overcoming culture shock together

Moving abroad is generally synonymous with an adventure that is fulfilling on every level, including discovering new cultures and lifestyles. Even if you do lots of research about the country you are moving to before you leave, you will almost inevitably experience culture shock when you arrive, especially if it is your first time moving abroad. On the other hand, having your partner with you can make this easier, particularly if you do not speak the local language very well and are struggling to fit in. You are less likely to throw in the towel and want to come home. Quite the contrary! You will be more motivated to tackle new challenges if you’re with someone, making your time abroad a memorable experience in every possible way. Why not sign up for language classes together and put your new skills to use?

You’ll be closer than ever

When you choose to go abroad, you quickly realise that your friends and family are no longer there if you need them. Of course, it is important to stay in touch via phone, instant message or social media. However, your new adventure abroad can have a really positive impact on your relationship. When you find yourself alone in a country that you are not familiar with, you will normally become closer and stick together. It will also teach you to count on one another when difficulties arise, rather than seeking support from your friends and family. On a financial level, moving abroad as a couple can teach you many things, like how to draft a budget and save money, for example, rather than partying non-stop. Furthermore, you will no longer need to wait for your friends to be free to enjoy a night out. You can simply make a date to walk around the neighbourhood, do the shopping or chill out on the terrace of a café after work.

Feeling lonely when one of you is gone

Moving abroad as a couple also has disadvantages, especially if only one of you works. Various studies show that, in most cases, women choose to abandon their careers and social lives to follow their partner to the other side of the world. On the other hand, the first few months can be really tough when you don’t know anybody there. You could be forced to cancel dinner at a restaurant at the last minute due to work obligations. Have you considered how your partner will react when you tell them you will be gone all weekend on a business trip? Moreover, there is a significant risk that your partner will start to feel isolated and become depressed due to the lack of activities and opportunities.

Poor communication can be a source of conflict

It’s not always easy to have a good time together when you work, except on weekends. Your busy schedule can have a major impact on your communication as a couple, although you may not realise it. For example, you may forget to let your partner know that you cannot make dinner that night, which can leave them feeling disappointed. Additionally, your partner may misinterpret the fact that you devote more time to establishing a social life rather than your relationship, which could lead to frequent fights. How do you tell your partner that you need some time alone to find calm amidst the chaos, when the decision to move abroad was initially made by the two of you?

Expanding your social circle is complicated

Developing your social and professional circle is undoubtedly one of the keys to a successful move abroad. However, will you really be able to do this when you’re with your partner? This obviously involves meeting new people with the same interests and passions as you and trying to spend time with them in order to fit into your new environment. It goes without saying that you will often find yourself forging new friendships rather than devoting more time to your relationship, which can be even trickier if your partner is struggling to overcome culture shock or establish a new routine. A feeling of frustration can quickly take over and jeopardise your relationship and your integration.

Returning can be difficult

Returning home after a move abroad is every bit as delicate as moving abroad in the first place. When your employment contract ends, you will obviously have to prepare to move back home and get back to your old routine, which often means finding a new job and accommodation. What will happen if your partner prefers their new life abroad, or their career if they were able to find a good fit during your time in the other country? In some cases, the new country is a natural choice, since you have acquired a taste for adventure. Is your relationship able to face another move of this size? Are you on the same wavelength in terms of your plans for the future? Are you really ready to sacrifice the social life that you missed so much, and your ambitions, to spend the next several years in another country or further afield in the name of love?